My Sisters And Me Read online

  ‘Yes, well. Lots will seem different, of course, since you lived here before. But you probably will see some familiar faces.’

  Noelle swallowed her mouthful of ice cream. She was beginning to feel a little sick now, but whether it was the ice cream or the beginning tingles of nerves, she wasn’t sure. ‘Like Jenny?’

  ‘Yes, like Jenny. I think I’ve mentioned before that I occasionally see her around, but I just want you to prepare yourself that you might as well.’

  ‘Okay. Thanks, Mum.’

  ‘I have to go, love, I’m completely famished, and your ice cream slurps aren’t doing me any favours. Safe drive tomorrow, good luck with the house and I’ll see you at Christmas.’

  ‘I’ll call you from Maplewood,’ added Noelle.

  ‘Not too often. Just be with your sisters.’

  They hung up and Noelle looked at the mess on her floor, her mind elsewhere, already in her home town.

  Noelle tried not to think about Jenny too often. Which was hard, because she thought about her all the time.

  Chapter 2

  The following day, Rae was stomping around the house throwing things in and out of suitcases and ignoring her husband.

  ‘Are you bringing anything back up with you?’ he asked, wondering why he’d even opened this can of worms, already heading for the back door.

  ‘My childhood crap is heirlooms, of course I’m bringing it all back with me. I’m not sending it all to the dump. How rude are you!’

  ‘I wasn’t suggesting it went to the dump, it’s just that I know you’re going to be having a big clear-out while you’re down there. I was thinking maybe you should save some suitcase space.’

  She stared daggers at him to rival Lady Macbeth, and he tried not to laugh. He knew she wasn’t angry with him; she always got like this when she and her sisters went home. She was so busy thinking about how they were going to cope, she forgot how to cope herself. With that, he nodded, and backed out into the garden of their St Albans town house.

  Back inside, Rae surveyed the problem. The problem was that what she really needed was battle armour, and all she had were sweatshirts and ripped jeans.

  Fifteen years. Fifteen years since she’d lived in Maplewood. She’d been in such a rush to grow up and get out that it slightly blew her mind she was going back to live there again. But, also, she needed to chill the fuck out because it was only nine weeks – an extended visit really – she was hardly relocating. She needed to stop being so dramatic.

  She sighed and stomped towards the back door, flinging it open. ‘Just so you know,’ she called to Finn. ‘I’m going to leave most of my shit here. I need to save some suitcase space. And I came up with that plan all on my own. And I feel like you don’t understand how much I wish you were coming with me, so stick that up your behind.’ She smiled at him, and he came over from his spot on their swinging seat to bend his head to her, and enjoyed her with a long, bittersweet kiss.

  ‘I wish I was coming too,’ he said, cursing his project manager role at an audio-visual design company, which was swamping him at the moment. She nuzzled into him, and he promised, ‘I’ll be down to visit as soon as I can. Just don’t all kill each other before then.’

  ‘I might kill them, but I’ll be fine.’

  ‘That’s the spirit.’

  ‘All right, I need to get going soon. Will you help me load the car?’

  Finn followed her inside and stopped at the fridge. ‘I bought you a present – a six-pack of beers to get you through the first night.’

  Rae smirked, and took them from him.

  Once upon a time, Rae Lake used to disappear for a few days, sometimes a couple of weeks, when it all got too much and she just needed some space. This felt like she was doing the opposite, going back in time, returning to the lion’s den. She was leaving her grown-up life and her independence and having a homecoming of sorts.

  It frightened her a little. But then, a growing part of her felt a spark of true excitement. Because this sister had always kinda liked the things that frightened her a little.

  Emmy closed the lid of her laptop, washed her ‘I Need My Space’ mug one last time, and bid farewell to her little robotic machine.

  The door of her lab swung open and in trotted Alex and Mack, her co-workers, and her friends. They were carrying a gift, wrapped in spaceship wrapping paper.

  ‘I can’t believe you’re going,’ wailed Alex, throwing her arms around Emmy, smacking her slightly on the head with the gift.

  ‘Who’s going to be the life and soul of the party now?’ Mack deadpanned, before he ducked out of the way of Alex’s foot donkey-kicking at him.

  ‘You guys,’ Emmy said, touched. ‘I’ll be back before I’m even missed. Just don’t let anyone take over my lab. Or take credit for my research! Or take my glow-in-the-dark stars.’

  ‘We won’t. Open your gift.’ Alex perched on a stool.

  Emmy tore open the paper and pulled out a bottle of wine and a sweatshirt which was pale cream at the front, with large lettering that said, Remember you’re a Jedi.

  ‘Turn it over,’ prompted Alex.

  The back of the sweatshirt was black, with a quote from Star Wars’ Yoda warning to be careful about looking at the dark side because it can look back at you. ‘I love this, thank you!’

  Alex grinned. ‘It seemed perfect for you. You have to wear it any time you feel yourself getting angry, or thinking too much about how those Maplewood baddies are getting to you. You need to remember you’re strong. Also, we thought the jumper might be good as the weather gets colder, and spending that long with family can send anyone to alcohol. How are you feeling?’

  Emmy needed a moment to collect her thoughts. This was such a thoughtful present, and Yoda was right. If she spent her whole time back in Devon focusing on the bad memories, she was in danger of letting them define her again. She couldn’t let that happen – she’d moved on. Dammit. ‘Nervous,’ she replied. ‘I hardly ever go back home, especially now Dad’s… gone, and Mum’s off travelling all the time. I think the longest I’ve spent at home since I first moved away is probably three or four days. Nine weeks is going to feel like for ever. We’ll actually have to leave the house and be part of the community!’ She laughed loudly to cover her panic as she thought about who might still live there.

  To say Emmy and her sisters had a tough childhood was an understatement. The short history is that they were the weird family from the outskirts of town, and all three were bullied in different ways. Rae was judged and looked down upon for the type of personality she had, which only made her act out even more. Noelle was talked about because of who she was, ignorance being the opposite of bliss. And Emmy was the classic target: bookish, friendless, from a family of weirdos and with no hope of fitting in, she seemed the get the brunt, although she knew even now it would have been a lot worse without Rae around to act as bodyguard.

  ‘The nerd is coming home,’ Emmy said, in a robot-voice that made even her cringe, but at least it shook her from her thoughts.

  Mack gave her a final one-armed hug. ‘If anyone gives you any trouble, just remind them you don’t need to listen to their shit any more. You’re a grown-up. With your own lab. Just tell them you’re an astronaut.’

  ‘Okay, I’ll do that.’

  ‘And you can always hop back on the train from darkest Devon and come and see us.’

  ‘When do you set off?’ asked Alex.

  ‘Tonight. In fact, I’d better get going, Rae’s picking me up on her way past.’ Emmy pulled them both in for a group hug. She was going to miss this place and these people. Going home to Maplewood just felt like the opposite of going home.

  She bundled up her things and held her new sweater close. Did she have to do this? Yes, of course she did. And it might be fun. It was still work, after all, what she and her sisters were heading south to do. Just very different work.

  ‘See you later, alligator,’ Alex said, as Emmy headed to the door.

  ‘I
n a while, crocodile,’ Mack added.

  Emmy gave them a final wave and stepped out the door and into her sabbatical. ‘See you soon, baboons.’ I am a Jedi.

  Noelle walked out of Bristol County Court with all the last of the summer sunshine in her step. Her case had wrapped up far earlier than she expected, with a positive result (the Earth was saved for now!), and she was now free for two whole months!

  The first day of September was everything it should be: sunny skies, even as the day was coming to a close, the faintest chill in the mostly warm air, whispers of amber tickling the edges of the leaves.

  Since she had thought she’d be staying late to wrap up all her paperwork, Noelle had already packed everything into her car and had it with her in the city centre. She was ready to drive down to the house, but she decided to enjoy Bristol for just a smidge more, considering how lovely an early evening it was.

  Crossing the river, Noelle strolled to Starbucks, a smile dancing on her face. She’d not thought to bring her reusable cup today, but even she could live on the edge just this once. Although as she reached the counter she caved and picked up one of their twelve-pound ceramic travel mugs instead.

  ‘Pumpkin Spice Latte, please,’ she asked with pride. Hello, autumn.

  The barista’s motionless face betrayed the fact he’d probably spent the whole day making these drinks. ‘Sure. Name, please?’

  ‘Noelle. Thank you!’ He picked up a black marker and wrote her name on the side of the travel mug (she hoped it wasn’t permanent), and she moved to the side.

  ‘I love your bag,’ she commented to a woman with a large mustard-yellow tote, as she waited for her warm drink. ‘My sister Emmy could do with one of those, she has to carry these huge files to and from work.’

  The woman smiled and went back to her phone.

  ‘Where’s it from?’ Noelle asked. She could do with one too, actually.

  ‘Oasis,’ the woman replied.

  ‘Great, thank you! I haven’t seen my two sisters for ages, but I’m about to spend over two months with them doing up our old family home, and I can’t wait —’

  ‘Pumpkin Spice Latte for… Nowhere?’

  ‘Ooops, I think that’s me! Nice to talk to you, and thanks for the bag tip.’ Noelle took her drink and left the coffee shop, breathing in the cinnamon and nutmeg, and feeling all seasonal and toasty and You’ve Got Mail.

  Autumn was the best season. And their family home, surrounded by trees and a haven for hedgehogs, squirrels and dormice, never looked better than it did in the last months of the year.

  Ever since the mention of Jenny last night, Noelle’s slight nerves had been transforming themselves into adrenaline. She was coming home.

  Chapter 3

  Rae pounded the car horn with her fist outside Emmy’s house, hollering ‘Emmmmyyyyyyy’ out of the driver’s seat window.

  Emmy flung open her front door. ‘Would you shush?’ she cried into the dusk. It was only early evening but the autumnal sun had already dipped, and the street upon which Emmy lived was quiet and peaceful – up until the appearance of her older sister.

  Rae jumped out of the car and headed round to the boot, squishing her belongings to one side. Two-plus months’ worth of luggage fitted Tetris-style into her raspberry-coloured KA.

  ‘I’ll be two minutes,’ Emmy called, backing away from the door and into the house. ‘Do you want a coffee?’

  Rae appeared at the door, grabbing Emmy and demanding a tight hug, all the while thinking how she’d missed these bony shoulders, this freckled face. Time apart from her sisters was always too long. ‘Nope, we’ll break up the journey with a coffee stop at a service station. Let’s hit the road, arsehole. Are these all your cases? What’s in the coolbox?’

  ‘Just stuff from my fridge that needs using up.’ Emmy looked back down the hall into her home. It wasn’t like she’d be gone that long, and if she really needed space from her sisters, or from Maplewood, she just needed to do what Mack suggested: jump on a train and come back to Oxford for a couple of nights. Noooooo big deal.

  ‘Sooo, how did it feel stepping away from the lab for two and a half months? Did anyone give you a leaving present? Did you feel like you were heading off to have a baby? I don’t think I’ve ever known you to take more than a week off at one time.’ Rae fired questions as she swooped around collecting up Emmy’s neatly stacked bags, a coat from the coat rack, a TV guide from her living room.

  ‘It felt fine, a little sad; they’ll barely even notice I’m gone, I’m sure.’

  ‘Jesus Christ, don’t do that from now until November.’

  ‘Do what?’

  ‘That – you!’ Rae looked her sister up and down. ‘How was that robot bionic eye thing you were working on? Did you finish it in time?’

  ‘Yep! I mean it’s not really a bionic eye, it’s a —’

  Rae made a loud snoring noise. ‘Hurry up and go into space, will you, I want to tell everyone my sister is an astronaut.’

  Emmy was distracted, trying to remember if she’d prepared her house for its lonesome spell. Was the heating off, but not too off so that the pipes wouldn’t freeze if winter came early? Was the compost bin empty? Were there conkers in the corner of every room, because she didn’t want to come back and find a family of four thousand tarantulas had taken up residence? ‘How about you? I bet your voice is looking forward to a break. You actually already look like you’ve been away from the opera scene for way more than one day,’ she added, her sister already beginning to look more like her old, potty-mouthed, Harley-Quinn-on-a-day-off self.

  Rae hesitated, midway through scraping her hair back into a scruffy high ponytail. ‘Actually, about that…’

  ‘What? Wait – don’t tell me you haven’t taken the time off. We all agreed —’

  ‘No, I have, I totally have. I just have one performance I have to come back to London for, all the way in November, at least two months away. We’ll be so close to finishing doing up the house then anyway, and I’ll only be gone for the weekend.’

  ‘Are you also going to be coming back and forth to visit Finn?’ Emmy asked, finally stepping over her doorstep and into the cold night air, locking her door behind her, lingering on every clack and pop of the latches as if she was leaving a part of her safely inside.

  ‘Nope, he’s about to start a huge project at work and will be travelling loads for it anyway. He’s going to come and stay, if he can, for a weekend some time midway.’

  Rae felt a wash of loneliness thinking about her Finn, her big bear, her electric blanket. But she shook her head, evaporating those thoughts. She’d be fine. She and Finn were solid as a rock and a few weeks apart was a chance to bring back that closeness with her sisters. It would be fun.

  She hoped. But Maplewood had a way of getting under her skin, whether she was two hundred miles away or back in her childhood home. She remembered it as gossipy, hard work – and cold. And she couldn’t shake the suspicion that Maplewood might be exactly as she remembered.

  Apparently, Rae’s voice wasn’t planning to take any kind of break, as she’d sung loudly along to every track on the eighties rock anthem playlist in the car. But two hours into the journey and Emmy was zoned out, staring at the tail lights and headlights that ribboned across the inky motorway.

  ‘Where are you?’ asked Rae, muting Aerosmith.

  Emmy looked over. ‘Hmm?’

  ‘Where’s your head at? You’ve barely sung along at all, and you’re not even eating the Haribo.’

  ‘Oh, no thanks. When my road trip buddy is a professional singer, the journey is more enjoyable for everyone if I don’t join in.’

  Rae picked up a jelly cola bottle and leaned over, forcing it into Emmy’s mouth. ‘Talk to me, Emmaline.’

  Emmy took a breath. She hadn’t meant to slip into a funk already – she already felt like a teenager again and she wasn’t even over the Devon border. She really needed to give this the open mind it deserved. The problem was, in her field it was
crucial to worry about things that hadn’t happened yet. She literally had to plan for the worst. So, it was hard to shake that and be all idealist – all Noelle – about it. Another Haribo would help. ‘Sorry. Right, how about a round of twenty questions?’

  ‘How about you tell me what’s on your mind?’

  ‘How about that game you like, Snog, Marry or Kill?’ Emmy tried.

  ‘How about… okay, Snog, Marry or Kill and then you have to talk to me properly. Snog, marry or kill: me, Noelle and Finn.’

  Emmy laughed, ‘Oh my god. Really?’

  ‘You have to do it.’

  ‘Marry Noelle —’

  ‘Why Noelle and not me?’ Rae cried.

  ‘Because she’s all earthy and makes soup and she has pretty hair so we’d have pretty-haired children.’

  ‘Well, that’s gross and incest, and you’re not her type anyway.’

  ‘Snog Finn —’

  ‘Bitch! Stop snogging my husband!’

  ‘And kill you, for making me answer this awkward question!’ Emmy concluded. ‘Okay, snog, marry or kill… um…’

  ‘Let’s talk about you now,’ interrupted Rae.

  ‘Why? I get to do a round.’

  ‘What’s going on? Is work okay? You didn’t lose another beagle up there, did you?’

  ‘Only a few,’ Emmy smiled. ‘It’s just… aren’t you nervous?’

  ‘About going home?’

  ‘Yes.’

  Rae considered her words, wary of fuelling the fire. ‘A little, but it’s not like we haven’t been home at all since we moved out or anything, we were back at Easter.’

  ‘But fleetingly. It’s always fleetingly. This time it’s lastingly.’

  ‘What are you so worried about?’

  Emmy paused, flicking her hair above her lip like a moustache while she collected her words. ‘I’m worried that nothing will have changed.’

  ‘Everything’s changed. We’ve all changed. You haven’t lived there for what… thirteen years? Only eleven for Noelle but it must be fifteen for me? I’m sure it’s going to be very different.’ She was so not sure.